Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Dinner is Served!

Steps to feeding me, as undertaken by Mother:

Step 1: Set the mood... usually I get a good brushing, then turnout to munch on some green yumminess while Mother prepares my dinner. Pickings is slim in the small.

Step 2: Place feed bowl with adequate water in it on floor in feed room.

Step 3: Add apple cider vinegar.

Step 4: Put "grain" in to soak. At the moment, my grain in Empower Balance, which is a creepy color, especially soaked, but whatever.

Step 5: Open Smartpak strip of suppies. Stir, shake, or do the hokey-pokey to incorporate.

Step 6: Add a small scoop of my special red salt. Slightly scanty most days, slightly more if it has been hot out.

Step 7: Add my IR powder.

Step 8: Crumble up some of my Withers & Withers IR cookies onto the mush.

Step 9: Squirt a little more vinegar in there for insurance. Stir, shake, or do the hokey-pokey to incorporate.

Step 10: Re-procure me. I am usually watching and waiting as I graze so I may amble up casually at just the right time.

Step 11: Go into feed stall, stepping carefully past Jeanie, who stares at me with hostile yet hopeful eyes.

Step 12: Often the grain is waiting for me. If not, I must wait as Mother opens the door, then I have to step back if asked, and put my ears forward before she'll put the feeder down. Sometimes I cheat by turning my head a bit and only put the closest ear forward.... GIVE ME MY FOOD!!

Step 13: Eat my perfect dinner while Jeanie stares. She'll get to lick the bowl when I'm done. And she gets fed three times a day, and I only get one graining, so stop sticking up for her!

Steps to feeding me, as undertaken by one of the aunts:

Step 1: Open Smartpak strip into feeder. Scooch into pile.

Step 2: Plop some of Jeanie's soaked feed onto my suppies.

Step 3: Sprinkle my IR powder on.

Step 4: Maybe remember the apple cider vinegar, maybe not.

Step 5: Aunt Marilyn holds my feed pan so Belle doesn't share. Aunt Carol may, or she'll plop the pan down and expect me to fend for myself.

I much prefer that Mother comes to feed me! Plus, I always get my goodbye kiss and cookies, or Herballs, as the case may be.

I guess she's not such a bad cookie and care human after all.

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